Dickbags Tour Update #1: Sunday 6/19/11 3:57p EST

Yay we are ON the road! Literally! My pee jug has already been vetoed, which means people are going to get pretty sick of me asking to stop to piss every 45 minutes very very soon.

Currently in some shitty part of NY west of Albany but east of Buffalo, our 1st stop.

Today started with a Bud Lime breakfast and then a failed attempt to climb the ropes at the EVR gym. Shame.

Have since found a new kind of bottled water that appears to be marketed towards alcoholics who want to feel like they’re ripping thru a pocket sized bottle of rotgut gin even when they’re just drinking water. This “Fred” fellow must be quite the ambitious degenerate!
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I also met my hero and the former featherweight champion of the world, Snoop Dogg! He was in town to market “Blast”- his foray into the “booze that tastes and looks like kool aid brewed in a sewer” market. I tried to explain to him that it tastes much better if you open it up and leave it out to air for a week, but he wasn’t having it.

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That’s all for now friends- and now the ongoing tally of stats for the week:

Number Of Times Joe Has Chastised Me: 2
Number Of Times We Have Wished Greg Strait Was Here: 1
Number Of Minutes Kyle Has Spent Picking His Feet: 4

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2 Responses to “Dickbags Tour Update #1: Sunday 6/19/11 3:57p EST”

  1. Kyle has spent WHAT exactly?

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